Do I Have to Tell My Partner I Want an Abortion?

Navigating a pregnancy decision can be difficult. If you think you might be unexpectedly pregnant and are considering abortion, you might be wondering what to do next and if you need to involve your partner in your decision. 

Legally, the choice to get an abortion or not is yours, and you are not required to get your partner’s consent. However, you may want to consider discussing this decision with him in a safe, calm environment before making your next steps. 

Take a few moments to go over a few things you might choose to consider as you determine how you might tell your partner about your pregnancy and your decision. 

What Should I Consider First? 

The most important thing to consider as you determine if or when you will tell your partner about your pregnancy is your safety. If you feel at all unsafe, prioritize getting yourself into a calm, supportive, and safe environment first. 

If you are scared of what your partner will do if he finds out you are pregnant, contact the Domestic Violence Hotline. You deserve love and respect at all times.

If you think you’ll remain in a safe environment, but the discussion of pregnancy might lead to a hard conversation, consider gathering some support around you. Even in the most healthy relationships, it’s likely that your partner may not respond in the way that you expect or that you may disagree on the best path forward. 

Knowing that you have a support system in your corner – for both you and your partner – can make a lot of difference as you navigate your decision. You don’t have to make this choice alone, and here at First Care Clinic, we have caring and compassionate staff who would be honored to be a safe space for you, as well as for your partner. 

How Do I Tell My Partner? 

Think back to how you felt when you first found out you might be pregnant. There were probably a lot of emotions going through your mind. Your partner may have a similar reaction with mixed emotions, or he may need some time to process the news. 

The best thing you can do is find a time when you’re both calm and comfortable. Consider what may be a low-stress time for both of you. You may even feel reassured writing down what you want to say first. 

Your partner may very well have a reaction that’s different than what you expect. Take the time to explain your point of view and also listen to his perspective. You might be expecting the worst, but he may surprise you with insight, support, or suggestions on the path forward.

Perhaps you may be considering an abortion because you’re fearful of your other options or your partner’s reaction to those options. You can’t know how he will respond unless you give him the chance to do so – and you’ll never know unless you try. Ask yourself: will you think back to the question “what if I had told him” later on? Remember, the choice is ultimately yours. You deserve to have all the information you need to make a confident choice. 

But Wait… Am I Certain I’m Pregnant? 

Your best first step toward pursuing a pregnancy decision is to confirm your pregnancy with a medical professional. Even if you’ve taken a home test, there is a small likelihood that it could be inaccurate, depending on when you test. 

The best way to confirm your pregnancy and to be confident in your options going forward is to meet with a medical professional. Our team at First Care Clinic can provide you with medical pregnancy confirmation and, through an ultrasound exam, determine what your most viable options are. 

Even if you are considering abortion, finding out key information about your pregnancy can be vital to your health. For instance, certain methods of abortion are only medically indicated and safe through a particular point in pregnancy. Knowing how far along you are – or if there are other medical complications present – can be incredibly important as you consider your next step in medical care. 

We’re in Your Corner

As you consider your next steps and think through how you might want to tell your partner about your pregnancy decision, know that there is support and help available to you. You may find it reassuring to discuss your options with a caring professional – and we’re here to help.

Don’t feel like you have to navigate this alone – we know it can be difficult, and we’re here for you. Schedule your free appointment today.

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